Lee Davy talks about a cash game hand that made him realize that his life contains too much envy, and how that affects, not only his poker game, but also his life in a general sense. 

I played my first cash game session last night. It was a $1/3 No-Limit Hold’em game in the Rio. I only had $300 in my pocket, meaning only one opportunity to make a bit of money.

I don’t have a very good cash game mindset. I always sit down with the belief that I am going to lose. There are other thoughts that infiltrate my mind that affects my game. Only having $300 in my pocket is one, wanting to win for my backer is another, and a desperate urge to win completes the trio of terrible thoughts.

I played a total of four hands. I was in and out quicker than a teenage boy facing his first hymen. I was staring at a KK9 flop, in a single raised pot, and I was holding KQ. There was $15 in the pot pre flop. For some reason I thought I could get $600 in it by the river. My plan worked, but I didn’t leave with any money. My opponent held K9.