The Phil Ivey v Borgata edge sorting case took a twist on Monday after Judge Noel Hillman, presiding over the legal tussle between Borgata and the card manufacturer Gemaco, ordered the card manufacturer to return $26 in a $9.9m lawsuit.

It’s not cool to spit your coffee all over your MacBook before mimicking a big fat ginger cat coughing up a hairball. Judge Noel Hillman just made me do that. The New Jersey-based judge is funnier than a man with a wooden leg trying to cross a cattle grid.

When most people visit London, they jump on one of those double deckers and drive around taking snaps of the Tower of London and Buckingham Palace all the while hoping a terrorist isn’t about to hop on board waving a machete.

Phil Ivey isn’t ‘most people.’