Week 14 of the English Premier League sees Arsenal move into the top four after a stunning 4-2 win against Spurs, and Cardiff emerges from the Premier League catacombs with a home win over Wolves. 

When I think of Man City’s defence of their Premier League crown, I think of a blind man driving down the street, rolling a cigarette, wheel on top of his knees.

It’s that easy.

The latest team to fold under the mosquito-like nuisance of the Citizens was Bournemouth. As per the script, City took an early lead when Oleksandr Zinchenko floated a lovely ball over the Bournemouth defence. Leroy Sane was onto it like a whippet, but Asimir Begovic sniffed out the danger only for the loose ball to fall to Bernardo Silva to despatch with aplomb.