Golf has followed poker’s lead by introducing a shot clock in the European Tour in the hope that the PGA Tour will one day follow in a bid to speed up the game and make it more adorable.

I learned a lot about ‘sport’ during my gambling days.

Take golf, for example.

I would rather unwind a rolled up hose pipe and let someone whack my one-eyed trouser snake than watch someone belt a ball around the grass for four hours, but all that changed once I flipped my coin and placed a bet on the guy representing heads. One minute I was listening to New Kids on the Block the next it was Pink Floyd.